Although it made perfect sense to me, to an outside eye, it may have appeared fascinating that Eve was enthusiastic, affectionate and talkative with the Easter Bunny, while extremely tentative with Santa.\u00a0 Yet, for a child with Social Communication Disorder<\/a>, the Easter Bunny is a dream-come-true, because he\u2019s encased in a furry suit and doesn\u2019t speak.\u00a0 Meanwhile, we all know that Santa will be face-to-face in his trademark red clothing– and sociable.<\/p>\n Furthermore, Santa was engaging children in crafts that required careful fine motor planning, which is a nightmare for a child with Developmental Coordination Disorder<\/a>.<\/p>\n From the photographs, one may see that Eve did well with both Santa and the Easter Bunny, though.\u00a0 There are no visual indicators of Eve\u2019s disabilities, so folks naturally assume she\u2019ll be okay in a variety of situations.\u00a0 Yet, Eve inhabits an in-between space with her abilities.\u00a0 Since the Easter Bunny was fluffy and didn\u2019t verbally communicate, Eve was quick to hug him, speak to him, wave, etc.\u00a0 However, when Santa was attempting to have a seemingly age-appropriate conversation, Eve couldn\u2019t respond.\u00a0 When Santa attempted the flower craft with Eve, he immediately noticed that Eve required more guidance and support with the intricate handwork.<\/p>\n I\u2019m not the first person to consider the in-betweenness of disabilities.\u00a0 In fact, each year Temple University<\/a> hosts a symposium on the changing landscape of how we perceive disabilities.\u00a0 Their theme for the spring 2014 conference was: \u201cIn-Between Spaces, Places, and Ways of Being.\u201d\u00a0 I could not think of a better title for enhancing awareness of living life with a disability.\u00a0 Life is filled with transitions, and people need strategies to navigate a variety of changes in their lives, regardless of ability level.\u00a0\u00a0 At Temple, they consider changes between identity categories, life stages, or disabling\/enabling environments.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Understanding In-Betweenness<\/b><\/p>\n As the mother of a child with issues that hinge on the idea of in-betweenness, we sometimes struggle with movement between places, and ways of being. Other days, we don\u2019t struggle.\u00a0 Eve has taught me to be in the moment.\u00a0 As her mother, and as an educator, I have an idea of where she \u201cshould\u201d be, both academically and developmentally– but perhaps in the future.\u00a0 Certainly, we have goals, and Eve receives speech and occupational therapy, in an incredible school.\u00a0 Yet, I need to accept Eve for who she is, and what she is capable of right now, in this moment.\u00a0 I accept her and see her for who she is– not what I want her to be.<\/p>\n My hope is to provide advocacy and support for the children and parents who have been affected by the in-betweenness of certain types of disabilities, which tend to be less visual, and not nearly as understood. Since I have a background in special education, I already thought I was pretty humble.\u00a0 To be the mother of a child with special needs, especially needs that aren\u2019t often visible, and that occupy an in-between space, has made me infinitely more humble.<\/p>\n Some children, such as Eve, occupy in-betweenness in the ways they appear okay, yet they\u2019re having trouble processing information.\u00a0 For example, Eve might suddenly scream, pull her hair, or place an inappropriate object in her mouth.\u00a0 She may appear shy, yet she\u2019s really not introverted; she just can\u2019t sometimes retrieve language to respond, or to formulate a story.\u00a0 She\u2019s going to be okay, yet everyday feels like a battle to do the simplest actions, especially those that involve motor control, such as riding a bike.\u00a0 Eventually though, Eve did ride a bike, and I cried tears of joy when those tiny feet pedaled.<\/p>\n In a landmark study by Lukia Sarroub<\/a> in 2002, she articulated the term \u201cin-betweenness\u201d as a powerful heuristic to signify the hybrid adaptation of one\u2019s practices or identity to one\u2019s textual, social, cultural, and physical surroundings.\u00a0 This notion of in-betweenness is an effective concept when considering that people often occupy and practice nearly everything in in-between spaces.\u00a0 I keep this in-betweenness in mind with Eve because I find joy in the simplest things she does and experiences, and in the same day, I sometimes feel anguish and intense anxiety about skills she has yet to master.\u00a0 We\u2019re somewhere in-between.<\/p>\n Hope in the In-Betweenness<\/b><\/p>\n At the end of the day, I acknowledge our in-betweenness as hopeful. From texts as old as the Bible, we can cherish the words \u201choping against hope.\u201d\u00a0 Just when I thought Eve might never write, she wrote her name.\u00a0 Even though the letters aren\u2019t the lovely script she\u2019s learning at school, her signature is instead filled with distinctive, artistic flair.<\/p>\n Just in the past year, Eve has grown tremendously. \u00a0She can now swing independently on a playground swing, finally pumping those little legs. \u00a0She has made friends, and even has little, inspiring conversations with them. \u00a0Instead of being obsessed with princesses and the “Frozen” movie, Eve is passionate about simple, natural objects, such as flowers, animals, and pinecones, and I think that is pretty cool.\u00a0 For now, I\u2019ll treasure this in-betweenness, because just as springtime provides us with imperfect renewal, our growth is gradual and continuous.<\/p>\n![\"IMG_0636\"](\"https:\/\/christinewoodcock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/IMG_0636-138x300.jpg\")
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